(Calling all cars, calling all cars...)
(Be on the lookout for a tall light-skinned brother with dimples)
(Wearing a black kangol, sweatsuit, gold chain, and sneakers)
(Last seen on Farmers Boulevard headed east)
(Alias L.L. Cool J)
(He´s bad...)
Aaaahhhhhhhhhh...

No rapper can rap quite like I can
I´ll take a musclebound man and put his face in the sand
Not the last Mafioso I´m a MC cop
Make you say, "Go L.L. and do the wop"

If you think you can outrhyme me, yeah boy I bet
Cause I ain´t met a motherfucker who can do that yet
Trendsetter I´m better my rhymes are good
I got a gourmet plate that says I wish you would

And when rap begin then I gotta join in and
Before my rhyme is over you know I´m a win
Cool J has arrived so you better make way
Ask anybody in the crowd they say the kid don´t play!

Sparring competition that´s my hobby and job
I don´t wear a disguise because I don´t own the mob
Got a pinpoint rap that makes you feel trapped
So many girls on my jock I think my phone here is tapped

I´m bad
(Cool J)
(Cool J)
(Cool J)
(C C C C Cool J J)
(Cool J)
(C C C C C C C Cool J J J J J)

I´m like Tyson icin´ I´m a soldier at war
I´m makin´ sure you don´t try to battle me no more
Got concrete rhymes been rappin´ for ten years and
Even when I´m braggin´ I´m bein´ sincere

MC´s can´t win I make ´em rust like tin
They call me Jaws my hat is like a shark´s fin
Because I´m bad as can be got my voice all waxed
Some brothers think he´s making records now he must have relaxed

I couldn´t shouldn´t and it´ll stay that way
The best rapper you´ve heard is L.L. Cool J
Kamikaze take a look at what I´ve done
Used to rock in my basement now I´m number one

And can happen on time never standin´ on lime
You wanna try me first you better learn how to rhyme
I´m the pinnacle that means I reign supreme
And I´m notorious I´ll crush you like a jelly bean

I´m bad

I eliminate punks cut ´em up in chunks
You were souped you heard me and your ego shrunk
I´m devastating I´m so good it´s a shame
Cause I eat rappers like a cannibal they call me insane

I´m as strong as a bull of course you know I am pull
I enjoy what I´m doing plus I´m paid in full
Not Buckaroo Bonsai but busted out as I
Say the kind of rhymes that make MC´s withstand I tie

Never retire or put my mike on the shelf
The baddest rapper in the history of rap itself
Not bitter or mad just provin´ I´m bad
You want a hit give me a hour plus a pen and a pad

MC´s they retreat cause they know I can beat ´em
And eat ´em in a battle and the ref won´t cheat ´em
I´m the best takin´ out all rookies
So forget Oreos eat Cool J coookies

I´m bad
(Cool J)
(Cool J)
(Cool J)
(Cool J J J)
(Cool J J J)
(C Cool J)

Never ever no never
Never wearin´ no Levis battle me why try
I´ll treat you like a stepchild so tell mommy bye bye
Sparrin´ MC´s and I´m a never get with
When I retire I´ll get worship like a old battleship

L.L. I´m bad other rappers know
When I enter the center they say, "Yo, yo there he go!"
My paycheck´s large Mr. Bogart in charge
Not a puncher or hunter from a rap cool large

The original Todd teachin´ how to be hard
Take the skin off a snake and split a pea from a pod
You´re a novice I´m noble and I decipher my tongue
Not Atilla the Hun but no I´m Threwler his son

My vulture´s exact like rack and pinion in a Jag
You try to brag you get your rhymes from a grab-bag
No good scavenger catfish vulture
My tongue´s a chisel in this competition sculpture

I´m bad
(Think I´m gonna need backup)
(Think I´m gonna need backup)
(What you need that for?)
(Yo this is L.L. Cool J)
(And you´ll never catch me so don´t even try it)
(I´m too bad for ya, understand...)
Aaaaaahhhh... I´m bad!