Frank:
How do you do, I
See you´ve met my
Faithful handyman.
He´s just a little brought down because
When you knocked,
He thought you were the candyman.

Don´t get strung out
By the way I look;
Don´t judge a book by it´s cover.
I´m not much of a man
By the light of day,
But by night I´m one hell of a lover.

I´m just a sweet transvestite
From Transexual, Transylvania.

Let me show you around, maybe
Play you a sound;
You look like you´re both pretty groovy.
Or if you want something visual,
That´s not too abysmal,
We could take in an old Steve Reeves movie.

Brad:
I´m glad we caught you at home.
Could we use your phone?
We´re both in a bit of a hurry.

Janet:
Right.

Brad:
We´ll just say where we are
Then go back to the car.
We don´t want to be any worry.

Frank:
Well you got caught with a flat,
Well how bout that!
Well, babies, don´t you panic.
By the light of the night
It´ll all seem alright;
I´ll get you a satanic mechanic.

I´m just a sweet transvestite
From Transexual, Transylvania.

Why don´t you stay for the night? (night)
Or maybe a bite? (bite)
I could show you my favourite obsession.
I´ve been making a man
With blond hair and a tan,
And he´s good for relieving my
Tension.

I´m just a sweet transvestite
From Transexual, Transylvania.

I´m just a sweet transvestite
From Transexual, Transylvania.

So, come up to the lab,
And see what´s on the slab.
I see you shiver with antici...pation.

But maybe the rain
Isn´t really to blame,
So I´ll remove the cause
But not the symptom.