In the pub, about seven thirty
Mother makes sure that his face ain´t dirty
Him and mother go everywhere
Holds her hand without a care

Lived with mother for fourty years
The neighbourhood said that he must be queer
Normal folk just ain´t like that
Glad he can´t hear behind his back

When mother dies, he will have a cry
´cos he´ll be on his own
He´s frightened stiff, would it come to this?
Will he lose her to the heavenly home?

In the pub, about seven thirty
Mother makes sure that his face ain´t dirty
Him and mother go everywhere
Holds her hand without a care

Lived with mother for fourty years
The neighbourhood said that he must be queer
Normal folk just ain´t like that
Glad he can´t hear behind his back

When mother dies, he´ll have a cry
´cos he´ll be on his own
He´s frightened stiff, would it come to this?
Will he lose her to the heavenly home?

Once went out with a London girl
Dirty weekend in a hotel
Broke it off when she got shirty
She was twelve and he was thirty

Right after that he was dead sore
He wouldn´t go out with girls no more
From that day since, he never has
He wants to do something dirty